As a young boy, Scott watched his father sing in seedy bars with a bassist who appeared to be afflicted with an uncontrollable leg spasm; he said to himself at an early age, "One day, I'm gonna sing in seedy bars with a bassist who appears to be afflicted with an uncontrollable leg spasm." Despite his hard work and perseverance, his dream did come true. But before he was able to live out his childhood fantasy, he cultivated a career as a singer in the following fashion:

His first stint as an "artiste de vocale" was as the fifth member of the Farm Stand Quartet, which played plantings and harvests, and during lean times, Bar Mitzvahs and divorces. During long periods of drought, his father single-handedly kept the FSQ in business. He moved on to a short-lived gig as a "shower singer." He had attempted to parlay his self-proclaimed virtuosity as a singer in his own shower into a full-time job as a shower-singer-for-hire, where he would sing in other people's showers for a modest per minute fee. Unable to support himself as a shower singer, Scott decided to "find himself," a task that would prove challenging and, ultimately, ridiculous: he was there the whole time!

He went on a retreat to a Buddhist temple, where he immersed himself in the ways of the Buddhist monks, who in turn, retreated from him after a single afternoon in his company. See, his chanting was tainted by a subtle yet unmistakable vibrato... a no-no, apparently, in the ears of the monks. He did learn one thing, however, in the few short hours he spent as a Buddhist: he does not look good in orange. He decided to grow out his hair and to embrace the teachings of a famous Chinese philosopher and, in conversation, would often preface a pearl of wisdom with, "Confusion says..."

One day, in an Irish pub, Scott was sharing axioms and Harps with a buxom blond when a bassist who appeared to be afflicted with an uncontrollable leg spasm approached him about joining a band that just so happens to play in seedy bars. It was at that integral, almost predestined moment in his life that Scott told the bassist who appeared to be afflicted with an uncontrollable leg spasm, "Can't you see I'm busy over here?" The blond eventually left the pub with another woman; and after considering the myriad of possibilities, he found himself alone at the bar with the bassist who appeared to be afflicted with an uncontrollable leg spasm. It was at that moment that Scott chose to use his mouth and the emanations therefrom for good, not evil. He decided to join with that bassist who appeared to be afflicted with an uncontrollable leg spasm to form the Celtic force of unnatural origin, Intestines and Tubers, which would eventually be renamed - to the chagrin of fans of consonance - Bangers and Mash.

Want to learn more about Scott's exploits with the band? Check out his live journal:

Diary of a Band Man